No, it’s not just you. Relationships are feeling more challenging than usual. And astrology tells us why.
Two planets that focus on human relationships, Venus and Mars, went retrograde this year.
Venus goes retrograde about every 18 months and stays retrograde for about 6 weeks. Mars goes retrograde about every 2 years and stays retrograde about 55 to 80 days.
When a planet goes retrograde, it’s in the point of its orbit closest to the earth and appears to go backward. Symbolically, the planetary energy is held internally and therefore expressed differently. Retrograde periods call us to move inwards. To review, reflect, or restructure the qualities of that planetary energy functions in our lives.
Working together, Mars and Venus retrograde cycles helped us separate from entrenched behaviors and relationships that no longer aligned with who we are becoming.
Let’s take a closer look at the themes each of these cycles.
2018 Mars Retrograde in Aquarius/Capricorn – Separation as an Act of Freedom
Mars went retrograde on June 26 at 9° Aquarius, until August 27. This period asked you time to rethink your approach to getting what you want and protecting it, within a larger group context.
Perhaps you found yourself stuck in groups that no longer fit your individual will. You’ve changed internally and so new friendships and organizations were called for to reflect this change.
Before that could happen, the Mars retrograde period probably saw you separating from old alliances. Either by choice or through unexpected events. This may have created internal conflicts and conflicts within your relationships. Your ability to stand up for your new desires were surely tested.
This time of separation also had the impact of landing you more in your heart. It was the one place that you could trust to help you discern what’s authentically right for you.
2018 Venus Retrograde in Scorpio/Libra – Relationship Overhaul
After a summer spent with the Mars retrograde, it was now Venus’ turn to help you through another round of untangling from the old.
Venus went retrograde on October 5 at 10° Scorpio. This period initiated you into deep intense transformation around values, relationships, money, and self-worth. All of which dealing touching on Scorpionic topics of the taboo, scary, messy, and feelings of shame.
Likely for you it wasn’t easy or pretty. It’s been weeks of intensely piercing into your relationships, in order to find out why and how you’ve gotten so off track. And Venus in Scorpio gave up her charm and grace for depth of connection and truth. It’s not a way of relating that works well for everyone. But it was needed. You may have seen things about your relationships that you didn’t like and now you had to do something about it.
Part of the retrograde period also took place in Libra. Overhauling our relationship issues around justice, equality, and decision-making. You may have found that you’ve consistently made decisions that weren’t in your best interest. It’s okay. You will do better next time. Venus retrograde, in this part of the zodiac offered the rebalancing within relationships you needed, so that you can consistently show-up for you.
Next Steps- Create the Healthy Relationships You Deserve
Now with some distance, we can more easily integrate what took place during the Mars and Venus retrogrades.
One way to do this is to journal about what happened during these massive cycles. Write about how you felt about the experience. Try to see it as objectively as you can. Here are some key questions to get you started:
- Which relationships left your life at this time? And why?
- What freedoms have you gained since then?
- What adjustments to existing relationships have been made for the better?
It may be uncomfortable to sit in all the feelings, but you can do this. Despite the challenges with relationships this year, remember, we heal through relationships. Seek-out a trusted friend, therapist, astrologer, or coach to help you move through the rough parts.
Lastly, this period will pass and you will create the healthy relationships you deserve.